Teddy Bears and Puppies
by Spacefille
Summary: She had a strange husband. He had a habit of bugging the phone line and was never around to talk much...


She had a strange husband. He had a habit of bugging the phone line and was never around to talk much. He was most impolite and unsociable to her guests (especially if they had blond hair and forked eyebrows) and always put the toilet seat down. He also took the garbage out regularly, cleaned the kitchen spotless after using it, and didn't lounge in front of the Vid Screen all day with a six pack of beer and potato chips... even on a Sunday. Ever. Which were all admirable characteristics indeed, but admittedly very strange for the modern day husband.

He also had a habit of buying Enise, their 2 year old daughter, gifts. Which was all fine and good, after all buying gifts was one of the signs of an attentive father, but their two year old daughter had an awful lot of this particular gift. There were so many of them that the vast majority had to be moved from their daughters room into other rooms in the house... like the guest room. And the sitting room. And their room. Her husband didn't seem to mind, but it was beginning to bother her a slight bit.

Anyway, on this particular sunny day, as Relena sat sipping tea in the kitchen of the expansive house she shared with her strange husband, he showed up suddenly at the doorway of the kitchen... with yet another gift in hand.

"I got Enise a present." He announced unnecessarily, holding it out.

Relena looked at him from over the top of her tea cup and sighed, trying not put down the china she held with considerable force. "Heero, dearest," she explained. "It's a teddy bear."

Heero looked down at the soft fuzzy object cocooned in his arms. "It is." He agreed neutrally.

Relena sighed again, folding her hands patiently in front of herself. "Dear, you've already gotten our daughter 86 of them already, she doesn't *need* any more."

"85." Heero corrected. "The panda came from Wufei."

Relena gave up looking diplomatic and threw her hands in the air in frustration. "Whatever." A sudden idea occurred to her. Perhaps she just needed to suggest other things for her husband to acquire their daughter. Perhaps the obsession with teddy bears stemmed from a lack of other good gift ideas suitable for a bouncy, growing little girl. Well, she decided, it was worth a try...

"You know I was talking to Hilde the other day..." she began in a round about fashion. She picked up her tea cup again and looked at her husband pointedly.

Heero was silent for a moment before he realized that it was his turn to speak and that he was supposed to respond and that all of this had relevance to something. "Yeah? And how are they?" In saying "they", he assumed Hilde, in speaking to Relena, informed the girl on the state of her own hyperactive husband, Duo.

Relena took a sip of her tea. "Fine. Little Helen is growing up to be just like her father. Speaking of Hilde and Duo though..." she shifted slightly in her chair. "They got something for Helen the other day that you may like to consider for our daughter..." she stopped and looked up at Heero.

Ah. He was getting the hang of this... it was now his turn to speak... whether he wanted to or not. He sighed. "Which was?"

Relena replaced her tea cup and smiled brightly. "A puppy."

Heero's eyes went wide. He dropped the teddy bear, staring at his wife in mute horror.

Now *that* wasn't a reaction she was expecting. Relena stood suddenly, concerned. "Heero what is it?" She asked.

The look was gone in an instant. "Nothing," Heero bent to pick up the teddy bear again. He turned to go.

Relena's brow wrinkled. "Okay... no puppy then?"

"No." Heero nodded once swiftly before beating a hasty retreat. "No puppy."

Sighing Relena sat again, resisting the urge to beat her forehead against the table top in slight frustration. 'So that's what you get for marrying a soldier,' she thought ruefully. She had to put up with his habit of bugging the phone line and never being around to talk much. And his habit of being most impolite and unsociable to her guests (especially if they had blond hair and forked eyebrows)... and love of teddy bears. And dislike of puppies apparently...  
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End.


End file.
